Overall working is great… I mean if you’re lucky it could even be your hobby, but even at the best jobs there are some key phrases that just grind your gears.
This is a list of those wonderful moments.
- I DON’T NEED A VALUATION – I KNOW HOW MUCH MY HOUSE IS WORTH!
Oh yes… we’ve all been there one way or another. It’s hot, so so hot, you’re sweating and have been travelling 30 mins to arrive to this petit little property in the middle of pretty much nowhere. There they stand at the door, happy to welcome you to their air conditioned haven. After a sip of refreshing water you commence. Slow at first but then the rhythm picks up, each room only seeming more familiar as finally it clicks, you’ve been here before, only it wasn’t here exactly, it was the same property in another complex, sold last year for the amount of 125,000 euros. Once viewed it’s time to share your findings, but first – the pleasantries – ‘lovely home, I love what you’ve done with the kitchen. Very unique.’ Now it’s business time.
After running through the buying price, year of purchase and most importantly, year of construction, you’ve arrived to some sort of logical conclusion. After sharing the fact that similar properties are now selling at approx 120k , the rough figure seems to round out at the 140,000 euro mark.
‘But I want at least 250,000 euros. People want to live in the sun you know!? Especially with Ryanair flying over here for less than a fiver from Bradford, 250 thous izza bargain!’
2. GIVE ME THE NUMBER OF THE SELLER – WE’LL TAKE IT FROM HERE.
Ok this one is understandable, after all, real estate agents don’t have the best of names, or rather, when googling – ‘business person looking to offer the best most unique service while returning all profits to local kids hospital’ most real estate agencies don’t pop up within the first few pages…
So, it’s hot again, a young couple, nationality is irrelevant, walk in to the office and explain in ultimate detail, how it’s virtually impossible to find a place to live for the summer season. ‘The hotel will be opening in less than a week and I still have nowhere to go… I need help! Anywhere will be fine! Im desperate!’
You empathise, really you do, they seem nice and it is unfair, everyone deserves a place to stay, so you get on it immediately.
After what seems like 30 phone calls to contacts you know within the area, finally light at the end of the tunnel begins to shine. A flat, located within 1km of the hotel in question has become available, two bedrooms, furniture provided and A.C. units in every room, it’s more than ideal, it’s perfect, even the rent is within our price range!
You praise the owner, thank him with all your heart for providing this opportunity then move toward informing the couple from earlier.
*it rings. You wait. Smile hurting your face as enthusiasm takes over. He picks up*
‘It looks like I’ve got the place for you guys! It’s available for viewing as soon as you can!’ the words spill from within a tone or two higher than normal but you shrug it off and blame it on the terrible mobile signal.
‘Great. What road is it on? Could I get the owners number? It’s not that we don’t want the house but, I’m sure it’ll be cheaper if we take the house without a real estate agent involved.’
You are reminded why you are so vividly on the storms side in the movie The Day After Tomorrow.
3. LOCALS ARE UNWANTED
Yes. You are right. The couple from number 2 were in fact Greek, I lied about the nationality thing, hence the reason real estate agents aren’t loved.
We aren’t perfect (Greeks). Hey its true! We really aren’t! We’re short, hairy, smelly sometimes, although that’s mostly due to the heat, loud, over dramatic, we hate tax BUT we aren’t all that bad, there are some things we do well…
I’m trying to think of something… Just a sec…
Anyway the point is, viewing a property, most of them are fantastic, special, personally tailored to one’s deepest needs and childhood fantasies, falling in love with it, capturing it’s vibe and marketing it, creating an entire theme revolving around the properties advantages just to lead to the one person, NATIONALITY IRRELEVANT, that one person that loves it and wants to spend their well earned money on making it theirs, and ultimately declining the offer due to them being local. Well, that’s unacceptable.
Whether renting or buying, we filter the interest to age and quantity, not on passport ownerships.
Should you include a ‘no Greek’ policy, I will intentionally unbutton my shirt, rattle my komboloi, barbeque an abnormally large lamb on a spit, turn up the music and complain about the economy.
You have been warned.
There you have it folks, the three things we absolutely love to hear from our clients!
Oh, it’s all in good fun, relax and smell the heat.